How to Support Your Partner in PA School: A Guide From Apps To Clinicals

If your partner is pursuing a career as a physician associate (commonly known as a physician assistant), buckle up. The journey from application through graduation is demanding, transformative, and – believe it or not – incredibly rewarding, not only for future PAs but for their partners too!

(Written by Coltrane Kubo, spouse of a future Physician Associate)

My wife, Phoebe, is a PA student currently in her final clinical year at Long Island University. We’ve been together since freshman year of college, and over that near-decade, I’ve learned what it really takes to support a PA student. In this article, I’ll share with you everything we discovered through the journey so that you and your significant other will be ready for each stage of PA school ahead.

My goal isn’t just to help you survive PA school as a couple, but also make the most of it. I’ll be sharing tips for supporting your partner (and yourself), practical strategies for PA school success, and even some personal insights that helped us to grow stronger together. This article is broken into 3 phases: first the uncertainty of applications, then the intensity of didactic year, and finally the chaos of clinical rotations. Let’s get going!

Phase 1: The Application Gauntlet – Strategy, Stats & Your Sanity

Compared to what’s coming, the application phase might feel like the calm before the storm, but don’t underestimate it. Keeping track of application timelines, writing killer essays, and putting their best foot forward in interviews is often the hardest hurdle to overcome for aspiring PAs.

With only 1 in 4 PA school applicants accepted each cycle on average, and most individual PA program acceptance rates are below 5%, an applicant will need more than just good grades and high hopes. Tailoring the application for maximum impact and casting a wide, strategic net across programs is critical.

The Numbers Game

Phoebe applied to over 20 programs, which is pretty standard for most pre-PAs. PA school is competitive, arguably moreso than medical school in terms of total matriculants, with medical schools admitting roughly 2.5 times more new students each year than PA programs.

Program Type	Annual Matriculants (Recent Data)
Medical School	~23,000 (source)
PA School	~8,800–9,000 (source)

Each PA program application typically requires 2–3 supplemental essays, not including the CASPA personal statement (the most important essay, Phoebe’s full guide to writing it is linked). So in total, your average PA school applicant will be writing close to 40 individual essays.

However, the essays are just the beginning. Here are the other core components of a competitive application:

• GPA: You’ll hear stats thrown around, but aiming for a science GPA of 3.6+ is a good benchmark for competitiveness.
• Healthcare Hours: Many programs require thousands of hours of direct patient care experience. To be competitive, aim for at least 2000 hours. However, quality and diversity of experience matters as much as quantity.
• The “Why”: This is where your partner can really shine. Admissions committees want to hear a compelling, authentic reason why they want to be a PA. Ask, what are you hoping to achieve as a PA beyond academics and getting a job? What is your mission? Phoebe really honed her “why,” and it made a difference.
• Standing Out: What makes them unique? Research experience? Volunteering? Leadership roles? Advocacy? Help them identify and highlight these. Sometimes, a powerful personal statement or unique experiences can help balance slightly lower stats. It’s about the whole picture.

Getting into PA school is a huge undertaking. Even as her partner, I didn’t realize how much work Phoebe was doing for applications until months into the process. However, being aware and prepared before program applications open will be a huge advantage, so you or your partner will probably want to start early.

Also, if you’re looking to strengthen your application or stand out despite lower stats, you’ll want to keep reading. Next, I’ll share an unconventional strategy Phoebe used to boost her application quality. This helped her get accepted on her first try, despite a GPA that wasn’t considered “competitive.”

Tips For A Standout PA School Application

Phoebe found reaching out to practicing PAs to be invaluable in her application process. While an obvious benefit was professional connections and potential job opportunities later on, where this approach really shined was by giving her a deeper understanding the day-to-day reality of the PA profession. By shadowing and learning early, she showed initiative and picked up stories that admission committees would resonate with. Their insights also helped her to tailor essays and interview answers more authentically.

Pro Tip: Invest in an AAPA (American Academy of Physician Associates) Pre-PA membership. It’s relatively cheap compared to application fees (as of writing it’s $50/yr), shows commitment when mentioned during interviews, and their directory can be a goldmine for finding PAs to connect with for informational interviews or shadowing opportunities.

As the partner of a future PA, your role in the application stage is to be the cheerleader, the proofreader, the sounding board, and the voice to keep them grounded. Help to stay organized and confident in themselves. Practice mock interviews, give them another set of eyes on each essay, and make sure to celebrate every submitted application with them! Remember, it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

(There’s so much more that goes into a successful PA school application, but writing all of it would make phase 1 of this article a full novel! Phoebe currently helps future PA students perfect their essays, prepare for interviews, and get accepted into dream programs, so for more tailored Pre-PA support, click here.)

Phase 2: Didactic Year – Welcome to the Firehose

First off, congrats!! Your partner got into PA school, which is a huge deal. Now comes the next big step: didactic year. You might hear people call it “drinking from a firehose.” That basically means students have to learn a massive amount of information very quickly. Didactic year is the main classroom part of PA school, and it lays the foundation for everything PA students (now called PA-S) will need in clinical practice.

According to Phoebe and her classmates, didactic year was the most intense and difficult period of their Physician Associate program for a few key reasons:

• Years of Material in Months: PA-Ss study advanced science topics, human anatomy and physiology, and the mechanisms of disease (pathophysiology). They also get an introduction to a wide range of medical specialties including cardiology, pulmonology, emergency medicine, and more, all while learning hands-on skills like patient examinations and clinical evaluations.
• Extremely Fast Paced: Imagine cramming a whole semester of college learning into just a few weeks. That’s often what it feels like. I’ve even heard PA school described as more difficult than medical school (by med students also!) because of how much information PA students are required to learn in such a short timeframe.
• Constant Tests: Expect weekly quizzes and comprehensive exams every month, stacked for around 6-8 classes at a time. As a non-PA student, it seemed like absolute insanity.
• Pressure to Pass: PA school grades are serious. Students usually need to keep their grades above a certain level to stay in the program. In Phoebe’s class, that threshold was a B-, and a few of her classmates unfortunately didn’t make it. This adds extra stress because passing each exam is essential.

During the first year of PA school, your partner will be living between the classroom and home. Even at home, you’ll most likely find them with their nose in a book (or, more realistically, class slides and Quizlet decks). Shared time shrinks dramatically, and for Phoebe and myself, it was a big shock to the system.

PA School Didactic Year Overview

Over the course of just 1 year, PA students must learn all of the foundational knowledge to begin practicing and supporting patients across specialties, which they’ll be doing in their second year. To keep up with this firehose of knowledge, just reading textbooks over and over usually isn’t enough.

Successful students often use a variety of methods to learn and remain engaged. Here are some of the most popular ways Phoebe’s classmates studied and stayed on top of their schedule:

• Made and reviewed flashcards (digital ones like Anki and Quizlet are popular).
• Studied by completing practice questions (using programs like Rosh Review).
• Make visual notes or charts, like Phoebe did.
• Read through the lecture slides to focus on the must-know information that the professors will prioritize testing.
• Explain concepts out loud and practice examinations – maybe even to you!
• Join study groups (these help some students focus and share understanding, but they need to be productive).

Phoebe’s Tip: If you’re just reading textbooks and watching non-tailored study videos, you’re wasting time. Phoebe focused on high-yield topics and created her own visual study guides from class slides and recommended resources. Making them was studying in itself, and the visual structure helped her recall complex information more naturally. It worked well, and she earned straight-A’s through her entire didactic year!

(Phoebe actually has full study guides for each class available, they’re lifesavers 😀 )

For partners of PA students, this is where “picking up the slack” becomes real. Groceries, laundry, cooking – you might find yourself doing more and more. The good news is, it’s not forever. At this point in the PA journey, you both need to put on your A-game and prioritize your time ruthlessly. Make the time you have together count. Offer encouragement. And when they’re inevitably too wiped out to talk, always remember that it isn’t personal.

Coltrane’s Tip: Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Stay connected to your own interests, friends, and hobbies. When you take care of yourself, you become a better partner, and the two of you will surely get through it all the stronger!

The didactic year is arguably the most demanding leg of the journey to becoming a physician associate. It asks a lot from your partner academically and mentally, and also requires a ton of patience, understanding, and practical support from you. By working together as a team, communicating openly (even when it’s hard), and remembering to take care of both your partner and yourself, you won’t just survive this period, but thrive!

Bonus PA School Didactic Year Advice

Finally, to make the most of this period’s opportunities, I’d recommend getting involved in the broader PA community, if possible. Phoebe served as student academy representative for her school, and from there made connections with people in the AAPA, later joining the House of Delegates, and the PA History Society. Not only did this significantly improve her resume, helping her to win the 2025 PA student of the year award, but also connected her to the wider PA world, opened doors, and allowed her to help shape the future of the profession!

If it’s within budget, I’d also suggest going to a CME conference (continuing medical education) like AAPA or one hosted by your state’s chapter (in New York, that’s NYSSPA)! I went with Phoebe to the 2024 AAPA conference held in Houston and had a great time meeting some of the other awesome PAs. If that isn’t an option, connecting with the upperclassmen in their clinical year is also beneficial for making valuable connections that could lead to introductions and job opportunities later on.

Phase 3: Clinical Rotations – Putting Knowledge into Practice

Just when you’ve both survived the academic firestorm of didactic year, the real-world phase begins. Welcome to clinical rotations! This is when your partner will try out different roles and specialties in a real medical practice. For about 4 to 6 weeks at a time, they’ll be immersed in a specific area of medicine, working in a hospital or clinic, before switching to something completely different. It’s exciting because they finally get to apply all that knowledge, but it’s also a wild ride.

During each rotation, your partner will be actively involved in patient care under the supervision of experienced doctors or PAs (called “preceptors”). Their days might include:

• Interviewing patients and gathering health histories.
• Performing physical exams.
• Suggesting possible diagnoses.
• Presenting patient cases to their preceptor.
• Writing patient notes in the EHR (electronic health records).
• Helping with procedures or observing surgeries.
• Learning the workflow of that specific clinic or hospital unit.
• In whatever free time they have left, studying for their EOR exams.

Most rotations have a steep learning curve. The hardest ones will likely be emergency medicine, surgery, and, in terms of the exams, internal and family medicine. Phoebe’s program had a total of 10 rotations, taking a full year to complete, but this may differ from school to school. Either way, it’ll be a significant portion of any PA student’s program.

If the didactic year schedule is characterized as demanding, the clinical year schedule can be thought of as chaotic. Here’s why:

• Different Specialties, Different Hours: An outpatient family medicine clinic might be a regular 9-to-5 job. But then, the next month on surgery could mean waking up at 3 or 4 AM for early rounds and staying late, like Phoebe did. Emergency medicine might involve overnight shifts. Pediatrics could be clinic hours one day and hospital rounds the next. Sometimes, they didn’t even provide a schedule until after the first day of rotations.
• Varying Commutes: Each rotation might be at a different hospital or clinic, and since Phoebe and I are based in NYC, some locations were hours away. This also meant figuring out new travel routes, and often dealing with rush hour commuting – adding extra time and stress to the day.
• Unpredictable Days: Even within a rotation, emergencies happen. A planned schedule can change in an instant, meaning your partner might get held up late unexpectedly.

Phoebe’s surgery rotations are perfect examples of how tough it can get. Those pre-dawn alarms followed by 12-plus hours on her feet, trying to learn and be helpful, were incredibly draining. That level of physical and mental exhaustion affects everything – mood, energy levels, even the ability to hold a conversation at the end of the day. Some rotations might be calmer, but others will push your partner to their limits.

How To Support Your Future-PA Partner During Rotations

If you were the support system during didactic year, now you’re their anchor in a constantly changing sea. Your flexibility and understanding are more important than ever.

1. Master Flexibility:

• Get comfortable with plans changing last minute. Dinner might be delayed, weekend plans might shrink, social events might be missed. Try to roll with the punches.
• Adjust routines as needed. Your partner’s wake-up time might shift dramatically from one month to the next. Assuming you live together, if their alarm going off messes with your sleep, I’d recommend earplugs and an eye mask. 😉

2. Handle the Home Base:

• During really tough rotations, you might need to take over almost all the household tasks: cooking, cleaning, laundry, errands, etc.
• Keeping the home running smoothly is a huge practical support. You’ll definitely be the point person for any household issues that pop up.

3. Be a Good Listener:

• Make time for them to “download” their day, even if you don’t understand all the medical details. Let them share the cool things, the frustrating things, the sad things, and the confusing things.
• Sometimes they might talk about difficult patient interactions or feeling overwhelmed. Just listening without needing to find an immediate solution helps more than you’d think.
• Understand that some days, they might be too exhausted to talk much at all. Giving them quiet space can also be supportive.

4. Offer Practical Help:

• Simple things can make a big difference: making them coffee during early mornings, stocking healthy snacks they’d like, ensuring their scrubs or work clothes are clean, and having dinner ready when they’re back at 8 PM will always be extremely appreciated.

5. Provide Steady Encouragement:

• Remind them how far they’ve come and how much they’re learning.
• Celebrate the end of each rotation!
• Help them de-stress in small ways if they have any energy left. Maybe watch a favorite show together, go for a short walk, or just have a quiet evening.

My work-from-home schedule definitely helped during Phoebe’s clinical year, as it gave me more flexibility to adapt. But even without that, being intentional about communication, support, and the time you do spend together makes all the difference.

How Best To Support Your Pre-PA Partner

To recap this entire article, remember that PA school puts a unique strain on relationships and requires conscious effort from both sides. However, by having realistic expectations and picking up the slack wherever you can, I know you and your partner will make it through, stronger and happier than ever!

Now, I know you’re ready to have the best possible PA school experience together, but here are a few of my final relationship tips to keep in mind at whatever stage of the PA journey you’re in:

• Communicate, Communicate, Communicate: Make it a point in your relationship to schedule check-ins, even if brief. Talk about unaddressed feelings, needs, and frustrations. Don’t let things fester.
• Quality over Quantity: You won’t have as much time together, so make the time you do have count. A quick walk, sharing a meal without phones, or even doing work side-by-side can still make for great quality time.
• Be a Team: Some days you’ll give 70%, some days they will. Understand it ebbs and flows. What’s more important is to celebrate the small wins together!
• Protect Your Own Sanity: You need your own life, friends, hobbies, and support system too. Don’t let PA school consume your entire identity. Make sure to build enriching daily routines and remember to check in with your family and friends often.
• Perspective is Everything: Find humor where you can. Remind each other (and yourself) why they’re doing this. Practice gratitude every day. This challenging season will pass.

Final Thoughts

Supporting your partner on their path to becoming a physician associate is definitely more a marathon than a sprint. The journey will require patience, flexibility, and a whole lot of understanding. But seeing your partner achieve their dream of providing people with quality medical care, and knowing you played a crucial part in that? That feeling is priceless!

As they say, sometimes the only way out is through, so embrace the challenges and rise to the occasion together. With the tips we covered in this article, I promise you’ve got this! And, if you ever want a little more support on your journey, I welcome you to reach out to Phoebe and myself at howmedworks@gmail.com for application coaching, didactic year mentorship, PANCE preparation, or anything else. 🙂

Thanks for reading! Be sure to check out some of the other helpful articles here at HowMedWorks like Phoebe’s 8 Tips for Succeeding in PA School. Until next time, I’m wishing you and your partner all the best on your PA school journey!